Vera looked uncomfortable.
“Now you understand.”
“I do.”
“Do you know what he told her?”
“That you were threatened.”
I nodded.
“Of course.”
“That you were trying to control the friendship.”
“Of course.”
“Petra believed some of it.”
“That’s obvious.”
Vera leaned forward.
“She’s beginning to understand now.”
“Why now?”
“Because you left the argument.”
I looked at her.
“What?”
“You stopped defending yourself.”
Vera’s voice softened.
“She can’t turn it into a debate anymore.”
That was one of the saddest things anyone said during the divorce.
“What do you want her to understand?” Vera asked.
I thought about it.
“That the ultimatum was the most honest conversation we had all year.”
Vera waited.
“She said Damon was going to remain in her life and if I couldn’t handle that, maybe we weren’t right for each other.”
“Yes.”
“She thought she was setting a boundary.”
“Probably.”
“She was.”
I nodded.
“And once she said it, I finally understood where the boundary placed me.”
Vera looked sad.
“You really think there’s no way back?”
“No.”
“What if Damon is gone?”
“That’s not the whole problem.”
Vera knew there was more.
Six days before my flight, Petra asked me to sit with her at the kitchen table.
Most of my things were already packed.
The walls looked strange where art had been removed.
“I ended it with Damon.”
I looked at her.
“The friendship.”
I waited.
“I blocked him.”
“Okay.”
“He isn’t part of my life anymore.”
I nodded.
Petra stared at me.
“That’s all?”
“What do you want me to say?”
“I don’t know.”
Her eyes filled.
“Something.”
I took a breath.
“Why did you end it?”
“Because I finally saw what it cost.”
There was the answer.
Late.
But honest.
“You told him he cost you your marriage?”
“Yes.”
I shook my head.
“What?”
“He didn’t.”
Petra frowned.
“You said—”
“He didn’t cost us anything.”
“Yes, he did.”
“No.”
I leaned forward.
“Damon was the situation.”
“What’s the difference?”
“The problem was what happened when I told you the situation hurt me.”
She looked down.
“I know that now.”
“I believe you.”
“Then why are you still leaving?”
“Because you only understood after leaving became real.”
Petra wiped her face.
“People learn.”
“Yes.”
“They change.”
“Yes.”
“So?”
“I hope you do.”
She stared.
“That sounds cruel.”
“I don’t mean it cruelly.”
“You’re saying I should become better for somebody else.”
“I’m saying this lesson doesn’t have to be wasted just because it came too late for us.”
She began crying.
This time, I moved beside her.
I sat there.
Didn’t hug her immediately.