You love not wanting to hurt me. Maybe you love me in some way. But whatever marriage means, you stopped doing it a long time ago.” Emily's face crumpled.
Nathan felt his own eyes burn and hated that grief could arrive alongside clarity. He turned to the question he had underlined. “Why did you tell Noah to call me Daddy?” Emily wiped her cheeks with both hands.
“Because I spent the last month imagining how I was going to tell you. Every version ended with you looking at him like he was proof of everything I had done. I was terrified you would hate him before you ever knew him.” “I don't hate him.”
“I know that now.” “No. You should have known it before.
You know me.” “I thought I did. But I also knew how it looked.” “How it looked?”
Nathan's voice rose despite his effort. “He is Marcus's son. That is not an optical illusion.” “I know.”
“Then why Daddy?” Emily struggled for the words. “Because part of me thought if I acted like you were still part of the family, maybe you would pause before leaving.
Maybe you would see him as a child first. Maybe I could explain.” Nathan stared at her with disbelief so complete it became calm again. “You tried to assign me fatherhood in the first five seconds of discovering your affair.”
When Emily heard it stated that way, she covered her face. Nathan closed the notebook. “That was cruel,” she said. “I see that.”
“Yes.” “I am sorry.” “I know.”
She looked up. “What happens now?” Nathan did not pretend uncertainty where none existed. “I'm filing for divorce.”
Emily's breath caught even though she had obviously expected it. He continued before she could respond. “I am not going to fight you over the house just to punish you. We will follow the law.